When is it time to quit? This is a question that many people ask themselves, and the answer is not always clear. Sometimes you have to hold on tight and fight for what’s yours. But other times, you’re ready to let go and move on. In this blog post, we will explore broken marriage quotes from those who have been in your shoes. These quotes may help you decide if your marriage is worth saving or if it’s time to consider divorce. Only you can make the decision, but these quotes may give you some guidance along the way.
An Unhappy Marriage is Such a Tragedy
Marriages often start out happy enough, but over time, the hurts can begin to pile up, and resentment stands between you and your spouse’s happiness together. When you start feeling like “forever” is a dirty word and only blame is left between you, it can test your patience and endurance.
1- “A… thousand miles of heartache gaped between them: hurts they’d given to each other, and hurts they carried all by themselves, because at some point…at some point they had become more apart than they were together.”
― Allie Ray, Children of Promise
Some marriages end in divorce when one person betrays their vows by cheating with another. When one spouse makes mistakes on this level, the other spouse may feel like laying blame is all that’s left.
Even if you are understanding of a spouse’s infidelity and accept their apologies, they may be ready to move on with separation and divorce. This next quote reveals the depth of pain you may feel when the person who you are still in a love relationship with feels nothing but hate or disgust for you in return.
2- “My life is just full of broken pieces, no tomorrow. All I can see is…broken pieces of tomorrow.”
― Soulla Christodoulou, Broken Pieces of Tomorrow: Strong women don’t give up…They find a way through tears and thrills to love again…
If a marriage is only pain, and you’ve lost all hope for reconciliation, it can make sense to consider a divorce.
When It Makes Sense to Leave a Marriage
When neither of you can speak a loving or kind truth to the other, an ocean of words can’t heal your grief. It hurts when happy marriages become two people just trying to survive in the same house.
3- “Sometimes I wonder, that one missing sock after doing laundry, is the smart one. After being unhappy for so long, it finally walks away from a frayed, worn-out relationship.”
― Anthony Liccione
Sometimes, partners feel alone when life becomes about conflict with their spouse. And if one partner uses their words or actions to control the other, the controlled spouse can feel like they’ve lost their voice and ability to express real emotion within the marriage.
When you can’t speak your truth any longer, a divorce can mean finding yourself again.
4- “I guess the moment when everything changed was when I realized I deserved so much better.”
Whether your marriage is built on friendship or you believe it takes passionate love to continue on, sometimes the tragedy’s staying with a husband or wife, not leaving. Quitting a marriage in favor of divorce can be the best decision you’ve ever made. However, it’s crucial to consider your feelings, but also talk with trusted advisors before taking action.
Mourning A Failed Commitment
When you realize your spouse broke their vows, whether to love and cherish or to be there for you in sickness and in health, you can feel more than unhappy. The hurt can feel immense.
Even though they are in pain, many individuals will stay in a marriage because their pride or convictions won’t let them admit it’s over.
5- “The end of my marriage meant the end of fighting for something I believed in: my commitment to God to stay faithfully married until death, no matter the circumstances.”
― Jen Grice, You Can Survive Divorce: Hope, Healing, and Encouragement for Your Journey
For some couples, having kids means sticking it out in a tough situation. As a father or mother, there is more to think about than your feelings when choosing divorce.
“40% of couples in the United States stay married for their kids, even if they are unhappy. 28% of Americans agree that couples should stay married if they have kids.” (1)
And sticking with your commitment is not always a bad thing.
However, sometimes your friends help you realize that your marriage is over. A best friend may see a lack of respect or note that your arguments seem out of control with your spouse. You may be left seeing that your world has changed while you weren’t looking. You then must decide what you will do next.
When Commitment Trumps Feelings
Depending on how you grew up and what your parents were like, you may believe that divorce is wrong in any circumstance. Or you may believe that some circumstances call for a divorce.
6- “The truest form of love is how you behave toward someone, not how you feel about them.”
― Steve Hall
Whatever your personal beliefs and convictions, almost everyone agrees that family is an essential part of life. Whether your family is blood relatives or others you know, we all need closeness with others who have faith in us. We need those we can count on to share life with.
7- “We have to recognise that there cannot be relationships unless there is commitment, unless there is loyalty, unless there is love, patience, persistence.”
― Cornel West
Making a commitment and sticking by it when things are not wonderful is part of wedding vows. There is something to be said about sticking in your relationship and continuing to “wash each other’s feet” -especially if nothing is obviously wrong. Commitment can carry you through tough times and into brighter days.
8- “If we commit ourselves to one person for life, this is not, as many people think, a rejection of freedom; rather, it demands the courage to move into all the risks of freedom, and the risk of love which is permanent; into that love which is not possession but participation.”
― Madeleine L’Engle
Commitment can be a beautiful thing with the right individual. However, only you can see when counseling or working on your marriage may help improve things and when it’s time to walk out the door.
What Tears Us Apart?
There are many reasons why people call it quits after they marry the love of their life. Common causes for divorce include:
- Lack of commitment
- Infidelity or extramarital affairs
- Conflict and arguing
- Lack of physical intimacy
The least common reasons are lack of shared interests and incompatibility between partners. (2)
If you’re considering divorce, talk with a North Carolina divorce attorney about your options before taking next steps. Protect your rights before it’s too late. After a divorce, you lose options to collect post-spousal support or alimony.
Why Fight For Your Marriage?
Some couples do counseling or engage in other efforts to try and revive a dead marriage. They may create a time and space for date nights, look for their lost love in self-help books, or meet with a minister and pray.
If you and your spouse both want to keep your love alive, consider these quotes to help heal a broken marriage.
9- “Always strive to give your spouse the very best of yourself, not what’s left over after you gave your best to everyone else.”
— Dave Willis
So reprioritizing your partner can make all the difference! Show them how essential they are in your life through your loving actions. Sometimes showing love can help resurrect a spouse’s love for you.
10- “No one can dance with a partner and not touch each other’s raw spots. We must know what these sensitive, raw spots are and be able to speak about them in a way that pulls our partner closer to us.”
― Sue Johnson
Broken marriages can be healed, but the brokenness must first be acknowledged. Half the battle is understanding what is happening and how to fix it. With honest communication of what’s broken and why, it’s often possible to get back on track.
If you’ve given your marriage everything you’ve got and nothing helps, it may be time to concede that your spouse is no longer part of the marriage. If your spouse breaks marriage vows every day while you give it all, something’s got to give!
We all say and do the wrong things sometimes. However, it may be time for a divorce if a spouse engages in the following behaviors:
- Repeated infidelity or acting like your marriage vows are only paper and don’t matter
- Lack of care for your pain or your story
- Actively trying to destroy your convictions or self-worth
- Abusive or threatening language directed at you or your children
- Abusive behavior, such as physical or sexual violence toward you or your children.
A partner engaging in these behaviors is not keeping their vows to love or cherish you.
If you’ve realized that your marriage is over and it’s time for separation and divorce, work with an experienced North Carolina divorce attorney to ensure you keep your marital rights safe.
We Can Help
At Plekan Law, we understand that broken marriages can sometimes find new life. However, if the facts and your hurt is telling you it’s time for a divorce, we can help you navigate the legal process of ending a marriage, including post-separation spousal support, alimony, child support, child custody issues, and more.
Contact us today to learn more about separation and divorce in North Carolina and to get started on your journey forward. We know it’s difficult to know what to do next, so we are here to listen as you figure out your next steps.